When I hit rock bottom years ago—addicted, depressed, and hopeless—the only thing I could imagine might help is running off to spend months at a time in the monasteries of India and meditation caves of Nepal. I spent weeks in silent retreat, learned how to meditate properly, sat with my seemingly endless pain until it started to feel a little more manageable, and slowly—very slowly—started to heal.
As I practiced on my own, I tried to fit into the mold of what I thought a spiritual lifestyle must be—the projection of “zen” we all see in movies—that forced seriousness and serene, otherworldly type of calm. An ascetic lifestyle where deprivation equals salvation. It all felt so foreign and oppressive to me. I call that feeling “zombie zen.” The volume of my personality was turned down so far that I barely recognized myself. I came to spirituality to feel alive again … and, honey, this wasn’t it.
As I struggled with this dissonance between what I thought spirituality “should” be like and how uncomfortable that was for me, I began to notice something. The time I spent with my most beloved teachers was always filled with joy, playfulness, and humor. My teachers didn’t expect me to change who I was at the base of my being. They wanted me to amplify it. We all melted into puddles of laughter together in between the quiet, meditative moments. In those moments, I felt closest to myself and could sense that my heart was fully activated.
And in my studies, I learned that the lineage of Tantric Buddhism is filled with radical saints who made the bold choice to leave the comfort of their temples and go practice with the common people, bringing the light of their practices to the darkened corners of the world.
That’s when I realized that spirituality isn’t about fitting in—it’s about breaking the mold. My whole life I’d been looking for a spiritual home, but now I knew that I had to build it myself. That’s how the concept of spiritually sassy was born!
Spiritually sassy is a movement that celebrates the misfits and the marginalized—those who have been craving a spiritual sanctuary of their own but don’t feel like they fit into traditional spiritual spaces. It’s for people who’ve been told you are “too this” and “not enough that,” and are ready to explore and embrace your weirdness, your unique style, and your fringe elements that make you so radiantly and beautifully you. It’s owning where you fall on the many spectrums of life, living in the complex grey areas between “normal” and “non-conformist.”
It’s a state of being in which you enter the world as an embodied permission slip, inspiring others to begin peeling back the layers of their conditioning and let their own freak flags fly. It’s a celebration of individuality and activating your innate superpowers in order to be of service to the world.
It’s making altruism sexy. It’s understanding that freeing yourself from the shackles of conditioning through a spiritual practice is a courageous act of protest, a living embodiment of activism.
My community is a home base for those who want to live life unapologetically bold and radically bright. For those who don’t only march to the beat of a different drum, they dance to it. Where you can demystify what spirituality “should” look like. Where you are safely nurtured into stepping into the fullest expression of yourself, whatever that looks like for you, and celebrated not in spite of who you are but BECAUSE of who you are.
My New Book
Today, I’m incredibly proud to celebrate the release of my new book, “Spiritually Sassy: 8 Radical Steps to Activate Your Innate Superpowers,” because it’s the culmination of all these discoveries so far. Here’s an excerpt from the introduction that summarizes my whole mission in life:
"If you’re like me, a linear path to inner freedom doesn’t work. The path I needed was intersectional. It was not this or that, but everything in between, because I don’t fit neatly inside any box. The definitions of spiritual life I saw around me didn’t fit me, so I began to search for spaces that felt like home. Eventually, I created the spiritually sassy way. I found home for me, and I want to invite you to it. Everyone is welcome here."
So honey, if you’re feeling out of place in your practice and wondering if there is a home for you, there is! Don’t give up if you feel like you’re practicing in black and white, but you’re ready to go technicolor. Follow the map of your heart until you find a space that welcomes you unconditionally and invites you to celebrate and amplify your own unique gifts like the spiritual Rockstar you are.
Then, be prepared to be amazed by the change in how you show up in the world. Once you’ve found your home, you’ll be able to freely and effectively cultivate and develop your best qualities and share them openly with the world, creating an impact beyond what you could ever imagine!